Everyday Rules for the Survivalist, #1: Trust Your Instincts

Friday, September 26, 2008

Why would you trust someone else's instincts instead of your own? Has the weatherman/woman really had a consistent record of correct predictions? Not likely. Don't allow yourself to depend on these people who feign expertise because, more often than not, your instincts are more reliable.

FYI - This rule is not limited to meteorlogical judgement. Your instincts can have as broad of an application as you let them. Gazelle often employs this rule in a myriad of interpersonal situations, while I most enjoy this rule's applicability to navigational conundrums.

Everyday Rules for the Survivalist

Thursday, September 25, 2008

1. Trust your instincts.
2. Maintain hydration.
3. Secure the perimeter.
4. Adapt, remain calm, and readapt.
5. Play to win.

Write these down. Make flashcards if you must.

Surviving McCain's Conspiracy

Monday, September 8, 2008

It has recently come to my attention that John McCain is taking over the world. My international and domestic sources confirm that this is true. How is he doing this you may ask? Well I have the proof here for you today. SUBLIMINAL MESSAGES! My sources tell me that the McCain family has invested the remainder of their considerable fortune buying up all the crosswalk push-buttons of America...

Take a Look.

By buying these simple devices that the American public sees and uses every day, they are being secretly influenced on a subliminal level to vote for John McCain. There is nothing the American people can do but resist as strongly as possible the inexplicable urge to push the button labeled McCain at the voting booth, just as everyday we push the button labeled McCain to cross the streets of America. This ingenious plot may result in yet another election fiasco. This time, instead of the voting machines being manipulated, we find the American people themselves are the ones tampered with.